Monday, September 28, 2009

Best and Brightest

Another Fall, another award....Jason has been named one of Greenville's "Best and Brightest"!


The highlight for Jason was not the glory or adoration from the public, but rather the location of the award ceremony. The recipients were treated to a "Hot Lap" at BMW's performance driving course, complete with spin outs and hydroplaning at 12o mph. It made the arduous presentation ceremony that followed bearable. And, of course, who can live without an engraved tire pressure gauge? Thank goodness Jason now has one! We were also glad to partake of the free dinner (our fourth in ten days!) because we need all the free food we can get these days.


Often people ask, "Is it difficult being married to a local celebrity?" As long as he doesn't get any ideas about being influential at home, he can collect as many awards as possible! Congratulations, Jason - your wife and son are honored to be related to you!

The entire article regarding Greenville's Best and Brightest can be seen here on page 66. You might also recognize some other familiar faces as well. Congratulations to the Class of 2009!

Monday, September 21, 2009

"Max Found Two Sticks"

Like this?



Nope. I mean the book "Max Found Two Sticks" by Brian Pinkney, which was the basis for the first Lollipop concert of the season sponsored by the Greenville Symphony Orchestra. Naturally, our Max had to attend! An actress read the book aloud while an orchestra member used various percussion instruments to illustrate the sounds in the story. Max was enthralled - drums, sticks, and all sorts of things that rattle and shake!
Word about the concert had definitely gotten out. It was packed and Sofia and Catharine joined us as well. At the end, all the kids received instruments and made a marching band, just like in the book!



We also learned that GSO does a joint venture with SC Children's Theatre and the spring performance will be "Where the Wild Things Are". Did they plan all these events with Max in mind?

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Waterboys

In celebration of Grammy's birthday, her favorite boys (and the rest of us) spent last weekend at the lake. Happy to be out on the water for some of the last warm days before fall, these waterboys kept us entertained with their silly antics and giggles!






We love Grammy!

Friday, September 18, 2009

Three Strikes

This has been the summer of court. After almost 3 years at my job, many of my clients' cases have finally wound through the criminal justice system. Although I am a regular at Family Court (which is the best spot for people watching), Criminal Court is a totally different beast. In their infinite wisdom, the legal minds of South Carolina decreed that a victim of child abuse is required to testify in front of the perpetrator. Some other states allow a child to testify via closed circuit television or in chambers, but not South Carolina. You can imagine how intimidating that is to a child - not only do they have to take the stand in front of a jury, a judge, assorted lawyers for both sides, the court reporter, the law clerks, the baliffs, the expert witnesses, and whomever else is deemed to have a vested interest in the case, but also in front of the person who hurt them. And then they are expected to talk about the most intimate details of a traumatic event. Scary enough for an adult to do that, much less a child.

My first client to testify in criminal court was a 12 year old girl. She was amazing - calm and collected (on the outside at least) and completely believable, despite the defendant glaring at her across the room. Her case was a rarity because there was DNA evidence that the defendant had committed the crime. After she testified, the child and I were playing Hangman in a waiting area. The first word the child put up was "Survivor". And she is one. However, the jurors were not convinced by the preponderance of evidence and the jury was hung. Her case will eventually be retried and she will have to go through the agonizing ordeal all over again. Strike One.

My next client was a boy whom I have worked with for over a year and a half. He has touched my heart in so many ways, as well as leaving his mark on every employee of my agency. His case was filled with the type of abuse and torture that is beyond comprehension. War criminals are not tortured as brutally as this child was. As the court date approached and the realization set in that he would have to face the perpetrator for the first time in four years, the child could not handle it. He just could not do it. After agonizing discussions (and some crying) with the Solicitor, we all agreed that it was not in the best interest of the child to go forward with the case. We were afraid that testifying would cause him more trauma after he had worked so hard to heal from the abuse. The perpetrator accepted a plea bargain and has been released from prison. Strike Two.

Earlier in the summer, one of my 5 year old clients was required to testify, despite our strenuous objections. She is five years old. The expert witness for the defense helped to pick apart every statement she has ever made. Following her testimony, the case was continued. Last week, I testified on her behalf. Then, once again, the case was continued. There is no end in sight for this family, who has been devastated not only by the trauma, but by having numerous family and friends called in to testify for the case. And it is possible that the child will be called to the stand once again. Strike Three.

Our system is broken and bleeding, just like the victims that it tramples upon. While I was on the stand in my last case, the defense attorney attempted to indicate that I was biased by sneeringly asking me, "'Aren't you an adovcate for this child?" I proudly answered "Yes, I am." The better question is, "Why aren't you?" Why isn't everyone who has a child or knows a child or who was once a child, an advocate for children? Why are we re-traumatizing victims by forcing them to testify and then still not getting any results in making children safer? There are many cases with more positive results, but way too many that end up causing more pain to the child. It is so important for all of us to stand up and speak out, to be an advocate, and to be a voice for change.

I am currently writing to legislators and news sources about this issue and received special permission from the guardians of these children to discuss their cases.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

2-2-2-22 Months


Dear Max,

Our neighbors have taken to calling you the "Rock Star" of the street. All the kids want to come over and play with you despite being a good bit older. They love racing with you in your car and trying to find items that will entertain you. You adore older kids, especially boys and girls who are the same age as your cousins. Jack has been teaching you to play football and t-ball, and I think you may have a real talent for baseball!

And like any self respecting rock star, you needed an entourage! Lately, that has consisted of your stuffed duck and St.X tiger. We have refrained from letting you sleep with them yet since Pelt is still your favorite, but you cart them around the house and in the car all the time. You are so adorable trying to hold all three of them and play at the same time.


Collecting has become a passion. Piles of rocks, sticks, and mulch are treasures that you collect in various places. The trunk of your car and the outside steps are your favorite places to store these irreplaceable objects. I believe a love affair with dirt and puddles is already well under way.


Max, you are such a family man. When both Mommy and Daddy are home, you insist that the three of us be together. When one of us is not home, you talk about the missing parent constantly. Now, you will say "Mama, Dada, and Maaaaa (x)" as you thump yourself on the chest. You love to identify everyone! You still do not speak a lot, but definitely understand what is going on. Your teacher reports that instead of taking a nap, you lie on your cot and talk to Pelt. Perhaps you are talking more than we realize - just not to us!


Thank you for being such a wonderful kid. Thank you for being you!

Love,
Mommy

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Excusez Moi

Ok, this is for all the naggers out there who keep bugging me about my lack of communication. A brief review:

Currently, I Am:

Working at a job with a new director, increased expectations, and decreased staff and supplies, and spending a large amount of time in courthouses.
Chasing after a toddler
Trying to sell a house
Attempting to keep my house spotless despite the best efforts of aforementioned toddler to
wreck it.
Conducting a major renovation on a new house
Asking myself daily why we didn't build a new house from scratch instead of paying for one and then proceeding to redo everything.

Currently, I am NOT:

Updating my blog
Uploading pictures to our website
Talking, emailing, or seeing any of my friends
Communicating with anyone besides my mother (who provides childcare), Phil (our construction supervisor), and a toddler who does not respond.
Getting enough sleep

Try to give me a little slack!

This Old (New) House

Since I haven't been posting regularly about the new house, a lot has been accomplished. Plumbing, electrical, insulation, masonry, hardwoods, drywall, paint priming - check, check, check! Although we continue to make our way through our to-do list, every week the checklist seems to grow longer! However, now many of the decisions are more fun as we start picking decorative details. And next week is closet organization systems - I cannot wait! Seriously.

It is amazing how a little sheetrock can make a house look like a house again!

Our huge kitchen!


The former hallway landing is now a laundry room and closet


The brick masons have finished taking bricks out and putting them in again


Bathroom floors are ready for tile


and the walls have been primed!


Onward to trim, tiles, and cabinets!

Monday, September 14, 2009

"Almost Famous" by Baby Max


Dear Ms. Paltrow,

I am writing to inform you that I hold a great treasure in my possession. I see that your son appears to be greatly attached to a small, striped tiger. I wish for you to know that I have the tiger's twin! Yes, I know you have been searching for the tiger's long lost twin for many years. I struggled with whether or not I should reveal his location to you. His twin has come to love being with me and is very attached. I have named him "Pelt". I see from these photos that you have actively begun a worldwide search for him. However, if you ever want to obtain Pelt, I will insist upon certain demands being met:


A Payment of One Meee-lll-ion Dollars
Lifetime Supply of Cheerios
Guarantee that Pelt will be the Lovey of Choice for your son

Yes, I am holding Pelt for ransom! He is my most prized companion and I could only part with him for an exorbitant amount of money and assurances of his well-being. You may contact my representative to make the necessary arrangements. Remember, I will not be double-crossed! The stakes are very high, but I hope your son's happiness means more to you than money.

Sincerely,
Max
King of Babies

Monday, September 7, 2009

Farms and Football


You can take the girl out of the country, but her son will still love tractors! Max was officially introduced to the upper crust of Dacusville society at the town's annual Farm Days celebration. We joined Grammy, Grandpa, and Aunt Deanna to review the antique tractor collection, take a ride on the hay wagon, and enjoy the opportunity to try out the merchandise.


While Jason was at the beach, Max was indoctrinated about all things green. Sorry, Dad, no flashy sports cars for this boy - it will be John Deere all the way!


As if that was not enough excitement for one day, we also decided to check out Furman's opening game that night. The Paladins were looking good....


...as were the fans!


Even Aunt Stephanie could feel the Purple Power!


Max got very excited at the game! However, it was about the balloons, the water bottle, the little girl sitting in front of us, and the row markers in the parking lot. He did not seem very interested in football yet. But we still have a whole season ahead for him to learn the FU cheer!


Tuesday, September 1, 2009

School Daze


After the long hot summer, I always relish the first time I walk out the door and feel the cool crispness of Fall. It not only feels different, it also smells different - like football and raking leaves and new notebooks and pencils. So it was appropriate that Max's first day back at "school" coincided with our first day of lower temperatures that indicate Fall is fast approaching. I don't know who was more excited for his program to start this year - Max or Mommy!


The home visit from his teachers and visit to the classroom had certainly put Max in the mood for school. He was ready and bouncing to leave much earlier than necessary and marched into the classroom without hesitation. A few smiles later and he had the teacher at his beck and call. His first stop was at the craft table to experiment with scissors and stickers. He paused long enough to give me a hug goodbye, but was enthralled by his new room and activities. Unlike last year, none of the parents stayed for long after dropping the kids off. They are all "big" kids now and much more self sufficient. I, too, left my big boy behind without tears this year, but with a little tug in my heart that time is passing so quickly and kindergarten is just the corner.